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Creek of Consciousness

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Nap Gold Medalists Still Nappin’

Written on 19 Feb, 2010 at 14:46 in Creek of Consciousness | viewed 101 times | 0 Comments

Children with backpacks are going to school. Adults with backpacks are going to hike. Old people with backpacks are going to need back surgery.... (Continue reading)

Creek Trickle

Written on 9 Feb, 2010 at 14:37 in Creek of Consciousness | viewed 184 times | 4 Comments

Here are some Creek Of Consciousness ideas or jokes that never amounted to anything. Enjoy.... (Continue reading)

Bring Your Pet To Work Day A Grapetacular Success

Written on 10 Jan, 2010 at 19:34 in Creek of Consciousness | viewed 378 times | 3 Comments

I bought a Snuggie and it didn’t work at all. I took a dump inside of it and it just made a huge mess! Thanks for nothing, Snuggie.... (Continue reading)

Rainbow Man and Lollipop Lady Get Colorful Divorce

Written on 24 Nov, 2009 at 21:45 in Creek of Consciousness | viewed 535 times | 2 Comments

I want my headstone to say, “Here lies Kevin – he didn’t understand anything.” People will think I’m trying to be cool or philosophical until they realize my casket is full of jellybeans. Then, they’ll get it.... (Continue reading)

Santa’s Village Adds Therapy Hut

Written on 2 Nov, 2009 at 13:49 in Creek of Consciousness | viewed 434 times | 1 Comment

You know you live in a city of lazy people when your mailman says good morning at 1pm. Also, he’s on a segway. And wearing a diaper. Y'know? I'm not sure he's the mailman.... (Continue reading)

Fat Symmetry Becomes A Reality

Written on 20 Oct, 2009 at 12:14 in Creek of Consciousness | viewed 468 times | 2 Comments

The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. The way to an artichoke’s heart is through dip.... (Continue reading)

It’s Just A Drug. You’re On A Drug.

Written on 7 Oct, 2009 at 23:23 in Creek of Consciousness | viewed 499 times | 0 Comments

People take anti-depression medication in developed countries but the third world has better medicine. The preferred prescription of the jungle is Tigergonnaeatyourass and the popular pill of the desert is Wherethewaterat? ... (Continue reading)

Mario Kids Trade Mushrooms For Pumpkins

Written on 30 Sep, 2009 at 1:10 in Creek of Consciousness | viewed 548 times | 4 Comments

Everyone thinks energy drinks are a new phenomenon but people have always had them. Coffee has been around for centuries and in the 80's people drank cocaine. ... (Continue reading)

Surfin’ Grandma Canes Her Way Into Semi-Finals

Written on 9 Sep, 2009 at 13:39 in Creek of Consciousness | viewed 511 times | 4 Comments

It’s impossible to choose a career when you’re a kid. My best friend swore he’d grow up to be a marine biologist but he ended up being a gay dude. ... (Continue reading)

Will You Ride My Scooter In Lieu Of A Mustache?

Written on 20 Aug, 2009 at 18:35 in Creek of Consciousness | viewed 763 times | 3 Comments

There’s nothing worse than a pimple on your lip. Except maybe getting tied to railroad tracks and not being saved by Popeye. That’s my short list of the worst things ever. ... (Continue reading)

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